Tuesdays with Morrie (20th Anniversary Edition)

Core Content Overview#

Story Summary#

The story tells of Professor Morrie and his student Mitch, conducting a series of conversations during the professor’s final days, exploring different topics in life.

Highlights#

A Passage That Moved You#

“He’s in his home with Japanese maples and hardwood floors, counting his breaths, fighting for every minute and second to spend with his beloved family and friends, while I spend countless hours reading things that have no meaning to me.”

The book has a passage describing how the professor calculated his death. The disease gradually erodes his body. He holds his breath, calculating how long he can hold it. As time gradually decreases bit by bit, it means death is getting closer and closer. This passage brings you into the death process that runs through the entire book. Reading each chapter, you can almost truly feel the professor’s breath diminishing, until the end.

This reminds me of an elder who died of lung cancer. During his hospitalization, he would use a device daily to record lung capacity, and he could only helplessly watch his lung capacity gradually decline.

He backed the car out of the garage and found he could barely press the brake. From then on, he could no longer drive.

He kept falling, so he bought a cane. From then on, he could no longer walk freely.

Others pretended not to look at him, but still watched. From then on, he no longer had privacy.

He smiled. From then on, he no longer had secrets.

Continuing with breathing, this is another passage describing the professor suffering from illness, gradually losing mobility. At first unable to move freely, then unable to walk properly, then needing help to urinate losing privacy, finally completely unable to move, needing others to bathe him, help with toileting, no more secrets.

Human contact. At seventy-eight, when giving to others he’s an elder, when receiving from others he’s an infant.

Death is nothing shameful, he won’t put powder on death’s nose.

Yet the professor wasn’t ashamed of this. He calmly accepted, truly feeling others’ support, being lifted, turned over and massaged for him. When giving, wholeheartedly, when receiving, likewise.

Interesting or Unexpected Parts#

“When others ask me whether they should have children, I don’t teach them what to do,” Morrie said, looking at his eldest son’s photo: “I simply say: ‘There’s no experience comparable to having children.’ That’s it, nothing else can replace it.

Friends can’t, lovers can’t. If you want to take complete responsibility for another person, learn how to give the deepest love and care, then you should have children.”

But if old age is so precious, why do people always say: “Ah, I wish I were young again.” No one says: “I wish I were already sixty-five.”

He smiled slightly. “You know what this means? This is dissatisfaction with life, regrets about life, not finding life’s meaning.”

Let it go. Tell yourself ‘this is envy, I’m going to throw it away now,’ then withdraw yourself.

Key Insights or Values#

“That’s what we’re all seeking, peace of mind about death. If we finally know we can peacefully accept death, then we can do that most difficult thing.”

What difficult thing?

“Peacefully accept life.”

“Learn to die, then learn to live”

Not knowing life, how know death (Analects) vs Not knowing death, how know life

“I die every night when I sleep. I am reborn every day when I wake.”

—— Mahatma Gandhi

“Forgive yourself before you die, then forgive others.”

Our beginnings are all the same — birth; our endings are also all the same — death. So how different are we?

Personal Reflection & Practice#

Impact on Me#

“Everyone knows they’ll die one day,” Morrie repeated: “But no one takes this seriously. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be like this.”

Imagine every day a little bird standing on your shoulder, asking: ‘Is it today? Am I ready? Have I done everything? Am I without regrets?‘

Practical Application#

Regarding life organization and effort, I think I have no problems. My problem is, I’ve never been good at feeling. I walk through beautiful scenery just passing by, hear others’ stories or experiences just observing. Now I occasionally slow down, trying to feel with my heart—walking on the road listening to children’s laughter passing by, sitting in a café observing the interior design, seeing other humans’ or animals’ experiences and empathizing. When feeling something, I let it permeate my whole body, then let it pass.

(However, seems to have become somewhat sentimental)

Extended Thinking#

Thought-Provoking Questions#

All these months, he could only lie there, couldn’t even lift his feet to walk—yet he only wanted such an ordinary day. How is this perfect?

Then I suddenly understood, this is the point.

… Coming to the story’s end

I believe he knew he lay in his own bed, his books, his notes and his little ficus plant nearby. He hoped to go peacefully, and he got his wish.

If tomorrow comes, what scene do you imagine yourself in? Who’s beside you?

When she finished singing, Morrie opened his eyes, tears streaming down his cheeks. Listening to my wife sing all these years, there’s never been a time like him listening so wholeheartedly.

Can we stop taking everything for granted? Can we deeply feel every heartbeat as if dying?

Recommendations & Summary#

Suitable Readers:

Everyone. In the face of death, exploring different topics in life.

Summary:

This book made me rethink life’s meaning, learning to stop in daily life and truly feel every present moment. Each topic explored in the book—death, love, family, regret, forgiveness—is worth carefully savoring. Perhaps everyone’s answers will differ, but these are all questions we should calm down and think about carefully. As Professor Morrie said: “Learn to die, then learn to live.”